Funny Jokes

A few not so politically correct Michael Jackson Jokes. I wasn’t sure if to put this under the Black Jokes
or White Jokes section, what do you think

Michael Jackson Joke 01
Bubbles the chimp will be happy Michael Jackson died, his ass won’t be red like a baboons anymore!

Michael Jackson Joke 02
Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning, he ate 12 year old nuts and a 13 year old wiener

Michael Jackson Joke 03
Farrah fawcet died and went to heaven. God gave her one wish. She wished all the children in the world would be safe, so God killed Micheal Jackson.

Barack Obama Jokes

Obama Joke 01
Bill Clinton said, “I didn’t inhale.”
Barack Obama says, “I didn’t inject.”

Obama Joke 02
Richard Nixon said “I am not a crook!”
Barack Obama says “I am not on crack!”

Obama Joke 03
Harry Truman said, “The buck stops here!”
Barack Obama says, “Leave the bucks here!”

Obama Joke 04
Q. Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack?
A. He thought Barry sounded too American.

I’ve been reading the various Obama joke pages online and have to say they generally aren’t very good! If you’ve thought of a funny Obama joke please post it as a comment.

Here’s some funny white jokes, was quite hard to find these and interestingly people are asking for funny white jokes on forums and places like Yahoo answers only to be called racists and that they shouldn’t be asking for this type of racist jokes!

In comparison there are dedicated sites to black jokes and not seen any complaints on those sites I collected black jokes from (update: getting plenty of complaints at the pages I added Black Jokes to though!).

Also some of these are rehashed black jokes so if you know some really good white jokes PLEASE post it in the comments below.

Mexican Joke 01
A bunch of Mexicans are running down a hill, what is going on? A Prison Break.

Mexican Joke 02
Did you hear about that one Mexican that went to college? yeah.. me neither

Mexican Joke 03
Did you hear about the Mexican who threw his wife over a cliff? When the police officer asked him why he’d done it he said, “Tequila! Tequila!”

Mexican Joke 04
Did you hear about the winner of the Mexican beauty contest? Me neither.

Mexican Joke 05
How do you get 50 Mexicans is a phone booth? Throw food stamps in it.

Politically incorrect nigger jokes.

Nigger Joke 01
How does a nigger pick his nose? From a mail-order catalogue.

Nigger Joke 02
What caused the nigger’s problem? Mother nature.

Nigger Joke 03
What did the nigger exclaim when he say he returned from the health spa? I need something illegal to smoke and alcohol to drink.

Nigger Joke 04
What did the sunbather shout at the nigger? Ain’t you dark enough already?

Nigger Joke 05
What do niggers and jockeys both ride? Animals.

The Ultimate Collection of 644 Chuck Norris Jokes, if you know of more please post them at the bottom.

182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year.

4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.

70% of a humans weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris’ weight is his dick.

A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.

Black Joke 1
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You’re so black you went to night school and the teacher counted you absent.

Please comment on this black joke below or if you know a better black joke please post it.

Black Joke 2
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A black guy walks into a bar with a beautiful parrot on his shoulder.

“Wow,” says the bartender “That is really something, where did you get it?”

“Africa,” says the parrot.

Please comment on this black joke below or if you know a better black joke please post it.

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Black One liners: I’m not a racist, but….

If you are a black person reading this and feel offended and want to get back at those damn crackers, there’s a place to do this at White Jokes where you will find some more poorly written racist jokes.

Back to the black one liner jokes…

Black Joke 01
Q: Why do blacks bury their dead upside down?
A: To use them as bike racks.

Black Joke 02
Q: What was the only thing missing from the million man march?
A. An auctioneer

Sex jokes, not suitable for young children.

Sex Joke 1
———–

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon place for their 25th anniversary.

As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband: “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?”

The husband replied: “All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry.”

Then, as the wife undressed, she asked: “What are you thinking now?”

He replied: “It looks like I did a pretty good job.”

Yo Mama’s so dumb i told her Christmas was around the corner, and she went lookin’.

Yo Mama’s so dumb I told her she lost her mind, and she started looking for it.

Yo Mama’s so dumb she got locked in a toilet and pissed herself.

Yo mama’s so dumb, she stuck the phone up her ass and thought she was makin’ a booty call.

Yo Mama’s so dumb she stole a free sample.

Yo Mama’s so dumb she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer.

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo Who?
I didn’t wan’t to make you cry.
__________________________
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Yo momma.
Yo momma, who?
Seriously, it’s yo momma, open the damned door!

__________________________
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Mary Lee.
Mary lee who?
Mary Lee we roll along.
__________________________
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Chimney.
Chimney who?
Chimney cricket! Have you seen Pinocchio?
__________________________
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Madam!
Madam who?
Madam foot is caught in the door!
__________________________

Avg rating: 3.5

Comment:First in a large collection of Free Funny Knock Knock Jokes. More Knocking to come later.

A new collection of free funny Yo Mamas….. so fat jokes to chuckle over.

Yo mama is so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the bathroom scale.

Yo Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.

Yo Mama is so fat, the highway patrol made her wear ”Caution! Wide Turns!”

Yo’ mama is so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

Your mama is so fat, that she uses the refrigerator for her lunch box.