Thousands of really hilarious jokes
A man approaches an ice cream van and asks, "I'd like two scoops of chocolate ice cream, please."The girl behind the counter replied, "I'm very sorry, sir, but our delivery didn't come this morning. We're...
Some members of a health club were having their first meeting to discus weight loss. The director of the group said, "Now, I'd like each of you to give the facts of your daily routine." Several...
Whenever my aunt went to the doctor, she would complain to me about the long delay she always endured. One day, when my aunt's name was finally called, she was asked to step on the...
1. Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your "shake" back to the table. Announce that it's the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake.2....
Having lost weight over the past few years, a lady was discarding things from her wardrobe that no longer fit.Her seven-year-old niece was watching as she held up a huge pair of slacks."Wow," the lady...
- So many men, so few who can afford me- God made us sisters, Prozac made us friends- If they don't have chocolate in Heaven, I ain't going!- My mother is a travel agent for...
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in.The doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight and found it somewhat below normal. The doctor asked...
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already. ...
- Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.- There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory....
- When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie.- You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.- Your biggest loss from a system crash is you lose your best jokes.-...
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