Thousands of really hilarious jokes
A police car pulled me over near the high school where I teach. As the officer asked for my license and registration, my students began to drive past. Some honked their horns, others hooted, and...
Two hobbits walk into a bar where one of them picks up a barfly. They taker her to a local motel; the first hobbit goes into the motel room while the other waits outside. Once...
Some years ago the president, tired of his low approval ratings, called up the head of the CIA and said, "I want your very best agent over here first thing in the morning." Moments later, a...
Mr. Jacobson decided to take a week off from the pressures of the office and went skiing. Alas, no sooner did he reach the slopes than he heard an ominous rumbling: moments later a sheet...
A professor asked a student to remain for a few moments after class. Holding out the young man's assignment, the professor said, "Did you write this poem all by yourself?" The student said, "Every word of...
While going through his wife's dresser drawers, a farmer discovered three soybeans and an envelope containing $30 in cash. The farmer confronted his wife, and when asked about the curious items, she confessed:"Over the years,...
A man was sprawled across three entire seats in a theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, "Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The man groaned...
The man asks the girl if she's afraid and she shakes her head bravely. He has had more experience, but it's the first time his finger has found the right place. He probes deeply and...
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one, dancing around in a threatening manner until you have...
Blind Joke 1 One day two blind men started fighting. Pretty soon a crowd surrounded them. Then one of the members of the crowd yelled out "I bet 10 bucks on the one with...
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