– The prosecutor sees your lawyer in the hall, and they high-five each other.
– During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.
– He tells you that his last good case was a “Budweiser.”
– He picks the jury by playing “duck-duck-goose.”
– During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.
– Every couple of minutes he yells, “I call Jack Daniels to the stand!” and proceeds to drink a shot.
– He frequently gives juror No. 4 the finger.
– Just before he says “Your Honor,” he makes those little quotation marks in the air with his fingers.
– Whenever his objection is overruled, he tells the judge, “Whatever.”
– He giggles every time he hears the word “briefs.”
– He keeps citing the legal case of Godzilla v. Mothra.
– He begins closing arguments with, “As Denny Crane once said…”