The truth is that if you take a little time to learn a few basic principles and some of the technical lingo, buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuclear reactor from wristwatch parts in a darkened room using only your teeth. So let’s
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The Devil tells a salesman, “Look, I can make you richer, more famous, and more successful than any salesman alive. In fact, I can make you the greatest salesman that ever lived.”"Well,” says the salesman, “what do I have to do in return?”
The Devil smiles, “Well, of course you have to give me
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Two cab drivers met. “Hey,” asked one, “why did you paint one side of your cab red and the other side blue?”"Well,” the other responded, “when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other.”
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The old Indian chief sat in his home on the reservation, smoking his ceremonial pipe, eyeing the two U.S. government officials sent to interview him.
“Chief Two Eagles,” one official began, “you have observed the white man for many years. You have seen all his progress and all his problems.” The
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A man was driving down the road with twenty penguins in the back seat. The police stop him and say that he can’t drive around with the penguins in the car and should take them to the zoo. The man agrees and drives off.
The next day the same man is driving down the road with twenty penguins in
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Girlfriend: “And are you sure you love me and no one else?”
Boyfriend: “Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.”
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The Queen visits a mental hospital and goes to the first ward. The first patient she sees is sitting up and with his left hand he seems to be grabbing something from the air. She asks, “What are you doing?”
The patient replies, “I’m taking the stars from the sky!”
She then proceeds over to the
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A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, “Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.”"I know,” said the
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Vice Presidents and personnel directors of the one hundred largest corporations were asked to describe their most unusual questions that have been asked by job candidates.
“What is it that you people do at this company?”
“What is the company motto?”
“Why aren’t you in a more
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A physics student once got the following question in an exam: “You are given an accurate barometer. How would you use it to determine the height of a skyscraper?” He answered,
“Go to the top floor, tie a long piece of string to the barometer, let it down ’till it touches the ground and measure
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A man went fishing one day. He looked over the side of his boat and saw a snake with a frog in its mouth. Feeling sorry for the frog, he reached down, gently took the frog from the snake, and set the frog free.
But then he felt sorry for the snake. He looked around the boat, but he had no food.
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The woman asked her redneck lover, “Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?”"Sure,” he replied. “What’s your phone number?
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