Thousands of really hilarious jokes
Dec. 31Edward,I thought I said NO MORE BIRDS. This morning I woke up to find no more than seven swans, all trying to get into our tiny goldfish pond. I'd rather not think what's happened...
John was furious when his steak arrived too rare."Waiter," he shouted, "Didn't you hear me say 'well done'?""I can't thank you enough, sir," replied the waiter. "I hardly ever get a compliment." Read in full at...
December 14, 1972 My dearest darling John: Who ever in the whole world would dream of getting a real Partridge in a Pear Tree? How can I ever express my pleasure. Thank you a hundred times for...
Dec 25 My dearest darling Edward, What a wonderful surprise has just greeted me! That sweet partridge, in that lovely little pear-tree; what an enchanting, romantic, poetic present! Bless you, and thank you. Your deeply loving, Emily Dec. 26 Beloved...
1. Pays better than fast food, though the hours aren't as good.2. Fashionable shoes & sexy white uniforms.3. Needles: It's better to give than to receive.4. Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops eventually.5. Expose...
Bob Gibson, known for his sarcastic wit, caught teammate Curt Flood off guard with a rare compliment as Gibson watched him take batting practice."Way to hit the ball, roomie. If I could hit the ball...
Eye halve a spelling chequer It came with my pea sea It plainly marques four my revue Miss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it two say Weather eye am wrong...
The farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chicken's his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different...
- Hot water comes out of both taps.- You find out that a seatbelt buckle makes a pretty nice branding iron.- The trees are whistling for the dogs.- You find out that you can get...
"Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby, please leave another one.""Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk.""Please don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it""Milkman please close the gate behind you...
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