Thousands of really hilarious jokes
A man is sitting at a bar one night, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The woman next to him says, "Wow, that's a really fancy watch." Thanks, says...
A dumb blonde walked into a doctor's office with a hole in her hand. The doctor told her that he had to report all gunshot wounds, and this was an obvious gunshot wound, so...
Even though he could not tell time, my three-year-old grandson was wearing a watch when I visited. Later, when I was putting on my coat to leave, I asked him what time it was. He looked at...
A blind man walked into a bank with his seeing-eye dog that guided him everywhere. He walked into the center of the bank floor, took the dog by the chain, and started swinging him around...
A state trooper pulls over a car on a lonely back road and approaches the driver. "Sir, is there a reason you're weaving all over the road?"The driver replies, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here!...
A businessman was in a great deal of trouble. His business was failing, he had put everything he had into the business, he owed everybody-- it was so bad he was even contemplating suicide. As...
A Florida couple, both well into their 80s, go to a sex therapist's office.The doctor asks, "What can I do for you?"The man says, "Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?"The doctor raises both eyebrows,...
Time Joke 1 A blonde asked someone what time it was, and they told her it was 4:45. The blonde, with a puzzled look on her face replied, "You know, it's the weirdest thing,...
A social worker asks a collegue: "What time is it?" The other one answers: "Sorry, don't know, I have no watch." The first one: "Never mind! The main thing is that we talked about it."...
A bus load of tourists arrives at Runnymede. They gather around the guide who says, "This is the spot where the barons forced King John to sign the Magna Carta." A fellow at the front...
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