A man died and went to Heaven.

As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, “What are all those clocks?”.

St. Peter answered, “Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.”

“Oh”, said the man, “Whose clock is that?”

“That’s Mother Teresa’s”, replied St. Peter “The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”

“Incredible.” said the man “And whose clock is that one?”

St. Peter responded, “That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.”

“Where is Clinton’s Clock?” “God is using that as a ceiling fan in his office”

“What about the clocks for the Members of British Parliament?” asked the man.

St Peter replied, “Oh, we’re using them like a wind farm to generate all the electricity up here.”