Thousands of really hilarious jokes
- Weiner's Law of Libraries: There are no answers, only cross-references.- Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet the boss in the...
An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry storeone Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at hisside. He told the jeweler he was looking for aspecial ring for his girlfriend.The jeweler looked through...
When I find my code in tons of trouble, Friends and colleagues come to me,Speaking words of wisdom:Write in C.As the deadline fast approaches,And bugs are all that I can see,Somewhere, someone whispers:Write in C.Write...
A husband looking through the paper came upon a study that said women use more words than men. It read, "Men use about 15,000 words per day, but women use 30,000."Excited to prove to his...
A husband was trying to prove to his wife that women talk more than men. He showed her a study which indicated that men use about 10,000 words per day, where as women use 20,000...
My wife was in labor with our first child. Things were going pretty well when suddenly she began to shout, "Shouldn't, couldn't, wouldn't, didn't, can't!""Doctor, what's wrong with my wife?""Nothing. She's just having contractions." Read in...
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the reader who doesn't get it.Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very high.Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then,...
"Welcome to Entropy Burgers -- may I take your order?""I put in disorder a long time ago. The service here is getting worse all the time.""My experience Gibbs me reason to believe you.""I know the...
Two old friends met one day after many years. One attended college, and now was very successful. The other had not attended college and never had much ambition.The successful one said, "How has everything been...
Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50."The second...
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