– The prosecutor sees your lawyer in the hall, and they high-five each other. – During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway. […]
Two drug dealers were brought before a judge on drug charges. The judge said, “If, over the weekend, you persuade enough people to give up […]
Q. What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? A. One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish! Q. […]
A case of quality not quantity with these free funny lawyer jokes, these are all to small to be put into their own topic. Lawyer […]
Criminal Joke 1 Several years ago, Andy was sentenced to prison. During his stay, he got along well with the guards and all his fellow […]
A man reluctantly attends his lawyers funeral expecting to be one of the one people there, and is surprised to see a huge turnout for […]
A judge in a small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendant, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under […]
A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through […]
The defendant stood up in the dock and said to the judge, “I dont recognize this court!” “Why?” asked the Judge. “Because you’ve had it […]
Lawyer Joke 1 A lawyer with insomnia consulted her doctor. “Which side is it best to lie on?” she asked. “The side that pays your […]
Q: What do you buy a friend graduating from Law School? A: A lobotomy.
One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He […]
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I. Q. of 50? A: Your honor.
In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner: Defense Attorney: Before you signed the death certificate, had you taken the pulse? Coroner: […]
Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. “So,” he said, “I have been presented, by both of you, with a […]
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright […]
Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.
A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them […]
Three Doctors are discussing which types of patients they prefer. Doctor Watson says, ”I prefer librarians. All their organs are alphabetized.” Doctor Fitzpatrick says, ”I […]
I was on a panel for prospective jury duty. The first lawyer questioning us began right off as an intimidating showman and asked the question, […]
Judi was sitting at the defendant table while the state trooper was being cross-examined on the witness stand. The lawyer asked, “When you stopped Judi, […]
Why does New Jersey have all the toxic waste dumps and California has all the lawyers? Because New Jersey got first pick!!
An old man was a witness in a burglary case. The defense lawyer asked Sam, “Did you see my client commit this burglary?” “Yes,” said […]
An investment counselor decided to go out on her own. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in, and pretty soon she realized […]
A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. […]