Anti Racist Joke 01
“Now you see him, now you don’t, now you see him, now you don’t” A Racist on a Zebra crossing (didn’t say what colour the racist was)
Anti Racist Joke 02
2 racists walk into a bar. Ouch, Ouch
Anti Racist Joke 03
5 more racists walk into the same bar as the other 2. Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch
Anti Racist Joke 04
A fat racist and a skinny racist jump off a cliff. Who wins? Society
Anti Racist Joke 05
An apartment of 3 floors lives 3 families, A White family, a Black family and a Racist family. At 2pm on a normal working day, a fire breaks out and burns the building to the ground, which family dies? The Racist family, Because with the others at 2pm the parents are out at work and the kids are at school.
Anti Racist Joke 06
Why don’t racists like blowjobs? They don’t like any jobs
Anti Racist Joke 07
Why is a racist like a dog? Both mark their territory with shit
Anti Racist Joke 08
Why is a racist like a Racing commentator? Both start shouting when a new race starts
Anti Racist Joke 09
Have you heard the one about the racist who choked on Yogurt? He found out there was a foreign culture in it
Anti Racist Joke 10
How do you confuse a racist? Write PTO on both sides of a piece of paper
Anti Racist Joke 11
How do you get a one-armed racist out of a tree? Wave
Anti Racist Joke 12
How do you get a racist to laugh on a Sunday? Tell them a joke on Friday
Anti Racist Joke 13
How does a racist pick his nose? From the mail-order catalogue.
Anti Racist Joke 14
How does a racist steal a bike? Picks it up and runs
Anti Racist Joke 15
How many Nazis does it take to change a light bulb? 100. 1 to change the bulb and 99 to deny it ever happened
Anti Racist Joke 16
How many racists does it take to change a light bulb? 100. 1 to change the bulb and 99 to deny that the last bulb ever burned out.
Anti Racist Joke 17
How many racists does it take to change a light bulb? None, racists hate being enlightened
Anti Racist Joke 18
My racist has got no nose. How does he smell? Terrible
Anti Racist Joke 19
What did the racist do with a packet of M&M’s? Put them in alphabetical order.
Anti Racist Joke 20
What did the racist put on his job application form under the section “Sign here”? Sagittarius
Anti Racist Joke 21
What do you call 10,000 racists under the sea? A good start
Anti Racist Joke 22
What do you call a racist abortion centre? Crime stoppers
Anti Racist Joke 23
What Do you call a racist wearing a suit? Jim Davidson
Anti Racist Joke 24
What do you call a Racist wearing a Suit? Jim Davidson in court on a drink Driving Charge AGAIN!!!
Anti Racist Joke 25
What do you call a racist wearing a suit? Officer
Anti Racist Joke 26
What do you call a racist wearing a suit? The accused
Anti Racist Joke 27
What do you call a racist with 2 brain cells? Pregnant
Anti Racist Joke 28
What do you call a racist with a high IQ score? A Cheat
Anti Racist Joke 29
What do you get if you cross a racist with an Italian? Someone who gives you an offer they don’t understand.
Anti Racist Joke 30
What does a racist and a drunk have in common? Whatever both say ends in a slur
Anti Racist Joke 31
What does a racist and a sperm cell have in common? Only one in a million work.
Anti Racist Joke 32
What does a racist and an apple have in common? They both look good hanging from a tree
Anti Racist Joke 33
What happened to the racists snow tyres? They melted
Anti Racist Joke 34
What should you do with a group of racists? Hate them all for existing and put them all on a boat and send them back where they came from.
Anti Racist Joke 35
What’s Red, White and peels? A Ku Klux Klan member trying to get a suntan
Anti Racist Joke 36
What’s the best way to circumcise a racist? Kick his Sister-in-law in the jaw
Anti Racist Joke 37
What’s the definition of confused? Tell a Nazi the Holocaust didn’t happen
Anti Racist Joke 38
What’s the difference between a racist and a bucket of sludge? The Bucket
Anti Racist Joke 39
What’s the difference between a racist and a Pizza? A Pizza can feed a family of four.
Anti Racist Joke 40
What’s the difference between a Schoolyard racist and Adolph Hitler? Opportunity
Anti Racist Joke 41
What’s the most confusing day for a racist? Fathers Day
Anti Racist Joke 42
What’s the difference between a ghost and a racist? One is a sheet-wearing spook who tries to scare people out of their homes, and the other one is a dead guy.
Anti Racist Joke 43
What’s the difference between a racist’s house and a porcupine? With the porcupine, the pricks are on the outside.
Anti Racist Joke 44
What’s the difference between a redneck and a racist? A redneck will sleep with any of his cousins, but a racist only sleeps with them if they’re white.
Anti Racist Joke 45
Why did the Black fella, a Paddy Irishman and a Jewish kike cross the road? To beat up the racist on the other side.
Anti Racist Joke 46
Why didn’t the racist cross the road? He was afraid of the other side.
Anti Racist Joke 47
Why do racists compete on skin colour? If they competed on brains they would lose.
Anti Racist Joke 48
Why do racists smell so bad? So Blind people can hate them too
Anti Racist Joke 49
Why do racists stink of pee? Aftershave
Anti Racist Joke 50
A man walks into a Private Hospital for a Brain transplant.The doctor shows the patient 3 brains and 3 price tags next to each brain. The patient can choose which brain he wants.
A White mans brain £500
A Black mans brain £500
A Racists mans brain £2000
Patient asks why the Racist brain costs so much
Doctor replies “Cos. it’s never been used”
Anti Racist Joke 51
Englishman, Irishman and a Racist standing on a cliff. A genie appears and grants each one a wish, when they jump off the cliff their wish will be granted.
Englishman wishes for loads of money, jumps off and lands in a truck full of Money. Everyone lives happily ever after.
Irishman wishes for peace in Northern Ireland, jumps and lands in a field of roses with angels singing in the background. Everyone lives happily ever after.
The racist didn’t understand the question, jumped off anyway and died. Everyone lives happily ever after.
Anti Racist Joke 52
Englishman, Pakistani and a Racist on a plane. Pilot comes over the intercom, and asks each passenger to throw something out of the plane, as it is losing altitude.
Pakistani throws out a nuclear bomb, and says “We have way too many bombs in my country and we don’t want them”
The Racist throws out the Pakistani, and says “We have way too many pakis in my country and we don’t want them”
The Englishman throws out the Racist and says ” We have way too many racists in my country and we don’t want them”
Anti Racist Joke 53
Racists never tell people who they are almost like hiding behind a veil. A racist woman walks past a building site, Builders shout “Oi! Oi! Show us your face” (Bernard Manning 1981)
If you find these jokes not to your taste and would like to discuss racism, please go to this Racism Discussion Forum.