Burger Joke 1
Are hamburgers male? Yes, because they re boygers, not girlgers!
Burger Joke 2
Can a hamburger marry a hot dog? Only if they have a very frank relationship!
Burger Joke 3
Can you name two burgers who are royalty? Sir Loin and Burger King!
Burger Joke 4
Do hamburgers make good vampires? No, because they always find themselves in ghoulash situations!
Burger Joke 5
Do they really serve burgers in Transylvania? Very rare-ly.
Burger Joke 6
How are UFO’s related to hamburgers? Both are Unidentified Frying Objects!
Burger Joke 7
How can you tell which Burger Land baseball pitchers are left-handed? They re the one’s wearing the left-handed meats !
Burger Joke 8
How did the jury find the hamburger? Grill-ty as charred!
Burger Joke 9
How do gossipy hamburgers spend their time? They chew the fat.
Burger Joke 10
How do the Rolling Stones like their burgers? Plain – Rolling Stones gather no moss-tard!
Burger Joke 11
How do they prevent crime in hamburger country? With burger alarms!
Burger Joke 12
How do we know burgers love young people? They re pro-teen!
Burger Joke 13
How do we know hamburgers have high IQ s? They loin fast!
Burger Joke 14
How do we know that hamburgers love classic music? They re often found at the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!
Burger Joke 15
How do you insult a hamburger patty? Call it a meatball!
Burger Joke 16
How do you make a cheeseburger sad? Make it with blue cheese!
Burger Joke 17
How do you make a hamburger green? Find a yellow cheeseburger and mix it with a blue one!
Burger Joke 18
How do you make a hamburger smile? Pickle it gently!
Burger Joke 19
How does a burger acquire good taste? With a little seasoning!
Burger Joke 20
How does a pitcher walk a man in Burger Land baseball? He throws four meatballs!
Burger Joke 21
How far do burgers go in school? Through cowlege (then they get their 450 degrees!).
Burger Joke 22
How was the hamburger murdered? First it was rolled, then smothered in onions
Burger Joke 23
In what school subjects does the teacher say, Well done, hamburgers ? A wide range of subjects – meatyeval, history, meatematics and word grill.
Burger Joke 24
Is it proper to eat a hamburger with your fingers? No, you should eat your fingers separately!
Burger Joke 25
Name two tennis stars who are famous in the hamburger world? Bjorn Borger and Billie Jean-o’s Burger King!
Burger Joke 26
Is there a way to make a hamburger do the Hula? Sure, order a burger and a shake!
Burger Joke 27
Seriously, when the crooked hamburger took it on the 1am, where did it go? Heidelburg-er, Germany!
Burger Joke 28
What are some outstanding hamburger colleges? Brandeis, Cowlifornia State, Hoofstra, Pen State, Ranchelaer Polytechnic, Burgereley and Moosouri!
Burger Joke 29
What can you say about Ham Burger and Chief Justice Warren Burger? Ham Burger is well done and Chief Justice Warren Burger has done well !
Burger Joke 30
What did the hamburger say when it found out that most people liked hamburgers better than frankfurters? Hot dog!
Burger Joke 31
What did the hamburger say when it pleaded not guilty ? I’ve been flamed!
Burger Joke 32
What did the hamburgers say to the butcher who acted on a TV show? Welcome back, Cutter!
Burger Joke 33
What did they call it when NHL officials refused to allow a hamburger to play hockey in the league? Rink injustice!
Burger Joke 34
What did they do to the burger who thought he was a rooster? Cook-a-doodle-do!
Burger Joke 35
What did they say about the burger who went skiing for the first time? How the meaty have fallen!
Burger Joke 36
What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army? You’ve got no beef, soldier!
Burger Joke 37
What do burgers think when they are surrounded by gherkins? They think they are in a pickle.
Burger Joke 38
What do hamburger workers say on Monday morning? Well, it’s back to the old grind!
Burger Joke 39
What do some burger eaters have? A Hardee appetite!
Burger Joke 40
What do some people have against cheeseburgers? They say, Burgers can’t be cheesy!
Burger Joke 41
What do they call a meeting among the most brilliant people in Burger Land? A MEATing of the minds!
Burger Joke 42
What do they say about the noise at the Burger Land Super Bowl? It’s PAN-demonium!
Burger Joke 43
What do you use to determine if a refrigerated burger is cold enough? A thermomeater!
Burger Joke 44
What famous movie did the hamburger meat think of when they took it out of the freezer? They Fry Who Cam in from the Cold!
Burger Joke 45
What great song is associated with hamburgers and baseball? Steak Me Out to the Ballgame !
Burger Joke 46
What happens when two burgers fall in love? They live together in holy meatrimony!
Burger Joke 47
What is a hamburger’s favourite story? Hansel and Gristle!
Burger Joke 48
What is the hamburgers most familiar song? Home on the Range !
Burger Joke 49
What is the hamburgers motto? If at first you don’t succeed, fry, fry again!
Burger Joke 50
What kind of a pitch did Sandy Koufax of the old Burger-lyn Dodgers have? A fastball – a sizzler.
Burger Joke 51
What kind of baseball do burgers play? Ketchup baseball!
Burger Joke 52
What kind of company is a 24 hours hamburger joint? Fry-by-night!
Burger Joke 53
What kind of girl does a hamburger like? Any girl named Patty!
Burger Joke 54
What old-time song is the burgers favourite? Hammy – as sung by Al Jolson!
Burger Joke 55
What song do burgers sing on the job? Gristle While You Work!
Burger Joke 56
What system do they teach in Hamburger High’s math courses? The meatric system, silly!
Burger Joke 57
When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency? When the chips are down!
Burger Joke 58
When do burgers quit their jobs? The day they decide to meat LOAF!
Burger Joke 59
When do hamburgers most enjoy watching TV? During PRIME time!
Burger Joke 60
When does a hamburger wear a look like a smile button? When somebody says, Well done !
Burger Joke 61
When the crooked hamburger took it on the lamb , where did it go? Oh, ewe know!
Burger Joke 62
Where can a burger get a great night’s sleep? On a bed of lettuce!
Burger Joke 63
Where do the burgers go on New Year’s Eve? To a meat ball!
Burger Joke 64
Where does a burger feel at home? On the range!
Burger Joke 65
Where does a burger go on vacation? The Swiss (cheese) Alps or The Cheeseapeake Valley!
Burger Joke 66
Which baseball team is currently the favourite with hamburger fans? The Cincinnati Reds -because they re the Big Bread Machine!
Burger Joke 67
Which burgers are dishonest? Cat-burgers! (burglars)
Burger Joke 68
Which burger is famous for a long nose? Cyrano de Burgerac!
Burger Joke 69
Which burgers can tell your fortune? Medium burgers!
Burger Joke 70
Which burgers love to act? Ham-burgers!
Burger Joke 71
Which cheeseburger makes a big hit in baseball? A double!
Burger Joke 72
Which is the meat patties least favourite day of the week? Fry-day!
Burger Joke 73
Which meatballs get a little tipsy on occasion? The POTTED ones!
Burger Joke 74
Which of our meaty friends are into astrology? Those that are born under the sign of the Ham!
Burger Joke 75
Which people do the burgers hate? The ones who are always putting the bite on them!
Burger Joke 76
Which political discussions between the Russians and Americans keenly interest Burger Land citizens? The SALT talks!
Burger Joke 77
Which type of comedy leaves a hamburger cold? BITING humour!
Burger Joke 78
Who are the hamburgers favourite people? Vegetarians!
Burger Joke 79
Who can beat any burger at golf? Any LINKS sausage!
Burger Joke 80
Who do hamburgers love on TV? Archie Bunker’s son-in-law, the meathead!
Burger Joke 81
Who is the hamburgers favourite actress? Candice Berger!
Burger Joke 82
Who was the burger’s favourite all-time movie director? Sizzle B. DeMille!
Burger Joke 83
Who wins most of the medals for bravery in Burger Land? The meatball heros!
Burger Joke 84
Why are hamburgers essential to football? Because the game is played on a griddle-iron!
Burger Joke 85
Why aren’t burgers too good at basketball? Too many turnovers!
Burger Joke 86
Why can any hamburger run the mile in under four minutes? Because it’s a FAST food!
Burger Joke 87
Why did the pro football player from the last-place team drop pieces of hamburger into his soup? He wanted to know how it felt to take part in a Soup-er Bowl!
Burger Joke 88
Why do burgers laugh when you surround them with pickles? Who knows – maybe they re picklish!
Burger Joke 89
Why do burgers run the gauntlet? To test their meattle!
Burger Joke 90
Why do hamburgers act brilliantly on stage? They give meaty performances – especially if they are in their prime!
Burger Joke 91
Why do hamburgers feel sad at barbecues? They get to meet their old flames!
Burger Joke 92
Why do hamburgers make good baseball players? They re great at the plate!
Burger Joke 93
Why do hamburgers make poor pigeons? They won’t talk no matter how you grill them!
Burger Joke 94
Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!
Burger Joke 95
Why is President Carter important to Hamburger Land in April? One the opening day of the baseball season, he throws out the first meatball!
Burger Joke 96
Why was the burger thrown out of the Army? He couldn’t pass mustard! (muster)
Burger Joke 97
Why were the burgers in the refrigerator embarrassed? They saw the salad dressing!