Space Joke 1
What do you call an alien starship that drips water? A crying saucer !
Space Joke 2
What do you call an overweight ET ? An extra cholesterol !
Space Joke 3
President Dubya was awakened one night by an urgent call from the Pentagon. “Mr. President,” said the four-star general, barely able to contain himself, “there’s good news & bad news.” “Oh, no,” muttered the President, “Well, let me have the bad news first.” “The bad news, sir, is that we’ve been invaded by creatures from another planet.” “Gosh, and the good news?” “The good news, sir, is that they eat reporters and pee oil.”
Space Joke 4
What do you get if you cross an alien and a hot drink ? Gravi-tea !
Space Joke 5
A woman at a gas station noticed a spaceship landing in front of her. An alien stepped out of the spaceship and started to pump gas into it. The woman noticed the letters U.F.O. printed on the side of the ship. She turned to the alien and asked Does U.F.O. stand for Unidentified Flying Object? The alien answered, No, it stands for Unleaded Fuel Only!
Space Joke 6
Two aliens from outer space landed in Las Vegas and were wandering around the casinos. One of them volunteered to go inside and see what was happening. He came out looking rather shocked. “What’s the matter?” asked his friend. “It’s a very popular place,” replied the first alien. “It’s full of creatures that keep throwing up little metal discs.”
Space Joke 7
What did the alien say to the gas pump ? Don’t you know its rude to stick your finger in your ear when I m talking to you !
Space Joke 8
How did the aliens hurt the farmer? They trod on his corn.
Space Joke 9
What did the metric alien say ? Take me to your litre !
Space Joke 10
What do you call an alien starship that drips water? A crying saucer.
Space Joke 11
What do you call an alien surfing the Internet? e-t.
Space Joke 12
Why did the alien phone home on his mobile? Because it was so ET !
Space Joke 13
Why don’t astronauts get hungry after being blasted into space? Because they’ve just had a big launch.
Space Joke 14
Teacher: What do you think astronauts wear to keep warm? Girl: Apollo neck jumpers ?
Space Joke 15
Why did the boy become an astronaut? Because he was told he was no earthly good.
Space Joke 16
Where do astronauts leave their spaceships? At parking meteors.
Space Joke 17
Why didn’t the astronauts stay on the moon? Because it was a full moon and there was no room.
Space Joke 18
Why don’t astronauts keep their jobs very long? Because as soon as they start they get fired.
Space Joke 19
Two astronauts were in a space ship circling high above the earth. One had to go on a space walk while the other stayed inside. When the space walker tried to get back inside the space ship, he discovered that the cabin door was locked, so he knocked. There was no answer. He knocked again, louder this time. There was still no answer. Finally he hammered at the door as hard as he could and heard a voice from inside the space ship saying, Who’s there?
Space Joke 20
Two aliens landed in the remote countryside and went walking from the flying saucer along a narrow lane. The first thing they saw was a red pillar box. `Take us to your leader, said the first alien. `Don’t waste time talking to him. Can’t you see he’s only a child? said the second alien.
Space Joke 21
Where do Martians drink beer ? At a mars bar !
Space Joke 22
What did the alien say when his flying saucer landed in a stud farm? Take me to your breeder !
Space Joke 23
What do you get if you cross a student and an alien ? Something from another universe -ity !
Space Joke 24
What is an astronomer? A night watchman with a college education.
Space Joke 25
What does an astronaut do when he gets angry? He blasts off:
Space Joke 26
Which astronaut wears the biggest helmet? The one with the biggest head.
Space Joke 27
If an athlete gets athlete’s foot, what does an astronaut get? Missile toe.
Space Joke 28
What did the astronaut see on his skillet? Unidentified frying (flying) objects.
Space Joke 29
Why are astronauts successful people ? Because they always go up in the world !
Space Joke 30
Why did the boy become an astronaut ? Because he was no earthly good !
Space Joke 31
Where do astronauts leave their spaceships ? At parking meteors !
Space Joke 32
Two astronauts went to a bar on the moon, but they left after a few minutes ? You see, it had no atmosphere !
Space Joke 33
How do spacemen pass the time on long trips ? They play astronauts and crosses !
Space Joke 34
First Spaceman: I m hungry. Second Spaceman: So am I, it must be launch time !
Space Joke 35
What do you call a loony spaceman ? An astronut !
Space Joke 36
I want to be an astronaut when I grow up. What high hopes you have !
Space Joke 37
If athletes get athlete’s foot, then what do astronauts get? Missile toe.
Space Joke 38
An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter, “How do you feel?” “How would you feel,” the astronout replied, “if you were stuck here, on top of 20,000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?”
Space Joke 39
What do astronauts put on their toast? Space Jam.
Space Joke 40
What do astronauts wear to bed? Space Jammies!
Space Joke 41
What do you call an alien surfing the Internet? e-t.
Space Joke 42
What do you call a sick extraterrestrial? An ailin alien.
Space Joke 43
Two aliens landed their ship on a golf course and watched a young man golfing. First he hit it into the high grass, mumbling and cursing he retrieved his ball. Then he hit it into the sand bunker shouting curse words he retrieved the ball. Next he hit a perfect hole in one, then the first alien said to the second, “Uh-oh cover your ears he’s going to be really mad now”!